Sunday, October 2, 2005

Week with grey glasses

I have issues with my perspective.

Compared to the average Sahelian, I should just shut up and praise God 24/7.

Sadly, I do not tend to compare myself with the average Sahelian...
At least, I'll make every effort to talk about my week without crying anybody a river, and derive the positive side of things.

First of all, my cold persited and got draining. I slept in 2 mornings because I was too tired. And a few times, I did not sleep in and was braindead. Forget about productivity. The good side of that is that I did some practical "taking care of myself", in a way.
My team projects did not start too well... We have barely more than a month left, and I feel we are lagging behind, and that some are just not involved. The good side of it is that I am learning more when the others are not doing things for me.
The midweek was +-. We are reading "The Master Plan of Evangelism" as a group. I'm a bit uncomfortable about the whole thing, because we are, in a sense, teaching from something else than the Word. Doesn't mean its false, but still.
I got a list of the "counting of the cost" for Bible Talk leaders that got me crazy for a moment. Good thing I talked a bit with another brother, or I'd have gotten on a rampage.
On Thursday, the class was rough for our prof. He asked for our feedback, and the folks were none too nice with him. On one hand, what was felt by everyone was expressed. On the other hand, it did hurt _me_ to hear that, and I can assume it was worst for the prof than for me. Afterwards, I went to the debate I talked about in a separate entry.
On Friday, I went to a sister to get me new glasses. We found something good that was a little bit over budget, but nothing dramatic. It will lighten my look a little bit. Those should be ready by next week. We have a good relationship, but I did manage to say a comment she resented. We talked about it and got things sorted, but I was surprised by the whole thing. To me, it was a solved matter for months...
I guess there is much learning for me (hardly a new discovery)
Saturday, I had a d-time with some brothers, went to the lab to work a bit, and ended up wasting a few hours playing a silly game. Still, I got some work done. I got to the grocery store and bought some stuff I don't eat often to offer me a special meal, and a sister called for some technical help. Turns out she had nothing to do, so I joined her. We ate together, I tried to fix her DSL (to no avail), and we called in a few more brothers to watch National Treasure. Highly predictable on many levels. But did me well.
On Sunday, I gave myself some more time to pray, and arrived late at the leader's meeting. We shared good news (mine is that my Bible talk is having regulars now... highly unexpected but cool) and the short message was about the need to have loving leadership instead of insecure leadership. Being more loving is a challenge and a prayer request for me. After service, we went to eat to a restaurant in the east end, and a sister offered the meal to thank me for being encouraging to her. I personally would've used the word "evil", since I'm a tough personal trainer... when I am in action, I'm intense... getting into action is more challenging.
I got mail from a brother and it wasn't very positive. I need to pray and take the time to write him truly encouraging words, because he's going trough a lot.
I then treated myself to some more Baroque music and a siesta (I was sleep deprived). I slept more than I thought I would... lets just say I'll have to listen to the CD again.
With the roomates, we began the documentary "The World According to Bush", from the CBC's "The Passionate Eye". Badly titled, but very informative. We ate irish stew, wonderfully cooked by one of them.
Doing a recap like that shows that a lot of good stuff actually hapenned. In general I was under stress, sick and tired. I had the "how dare you ask more of me" kind of attitude. Falls in those generic "its obvious but I don't know why" kind of days.

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